i dream of surf

People dream the most outlandish, surreal, or to simply put it, weird things. Yeah, I know that. But what the fuck, I have this recurring dream that I find really non-sensical. At first it was kinda amusing you know, but dreaming the same dream and variations of it for over two years now is in no way a pleasant experience during the only time that I seem to be a normal person, sleep. Calling the Dream doctor, something’s wrong with my freaking subconscious.

Or maybe it’s trying to tell me something. Like a sign, a warning… (enter classic B movie musical score)

Version 1.0

First thing I see is that I’m in a beach or that I’m heading towards the beach. Then from afar I can see huge waves and surfers. Lots of surfers. Suddenly I realize where I’m at and that I can go surfing! I get very very excited and my first reaction to this is to find myself a longboard to rent. So I go about scouring houses, stores and just about everybody for a longboard. Now its either boards are all out, or I have to settle for makeshift boards. Boards that are impossible to ride out. They’re too small and they’re made from wood. They’re like toys. Yet people will tell me to use it. Pwede na daw yun. And this dream will end with me unable to find a board and getting very very frustrated. Then poof, i wake up.

Version 1.5

I finally got a board. It’s ugliest board you’ve seen but since I’m desperate, it’ll have to do. So I head out into the waters, but I couldn’t make it to the line up. I keep on sinking! No matter how hard I try it just wouldn’t work. Pretty soon it becomes dark and again I’ll end up frustrated. Then poof, I wake up. Huhu.

Version 2.0

It keeps getting weirder. I’m no longer in a beach but in a gigantic pool with huge artificial waves. There’s a lot of surfers still and this time I’m actually out there. Here’s the problem though. I couldn’t catch a wave where I was floating. It’s like I’m stuck where the waves couldn’t get to me. And when finally I’m all alone in this pool, it becomes night time. Time to stop the waves. I didn’t get to surf at all. Again I’ll end up frustrated then poof, you know what happened.

Version 2.5

Last thing I see before I wake up, my board is broken into pieces.

Why oh why couldn’t I just dream of hapily successfully surfing in the mid-day sun? And hey, why oh why does this keep on recurring? Am I not allowed to a decent surfboard? Best, does it have a logical explanation which I can attribute reality. My interpretation of it all? Real easy. I should erase the thought of surfboarding even if that what my heart really wants. I belong to a world powered by cables and connection. Perhaps in the real world, I am hallucinating. Dreams are simply dreams even to version 3.0